I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
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