just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
No I am not eating basil off your cock
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
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