Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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