I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
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