So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
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