Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
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