This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
Randomize
