im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
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