brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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