She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
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