Well apparently he's into motor boating.
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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