Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
Randomize
