This dress was meant to end up on your floor
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
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