Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize