You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
The magic cards should have been the first clue. The comments that I have "amazing birthing hips" and that I'm "beautiful in a child bearing sort of way just sealed his fate.
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
Randomize