Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
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