I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
Randomize
