saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
Randomize
