this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
Randomize
