the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize
