I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
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