Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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