i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
