i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
I'm at an open mic night and the next act is called 'the best creed cover band ever.' The guy i recently hooked up with is on bass.
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
I am naked and annoyed.
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
Randomize