oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
Randomize
