Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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