Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(513): View more from Ohio

My mom found a condom in my purse

(513): View more from Ohio

Correction: my mom found a used condom in my purse.

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(401): View more from Rhode Island

In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke

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(309): View more from Illinois

I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.

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(714): View more from California

Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww

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(612): View more from Minnesota

Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.

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(570): View more from Pennsylvania

I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.

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(510): View more from California

Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.

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(303): View more from Colorado

can you please not set my house on fire for once???

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(949): View more from California

when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.

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