Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
Randomize
