How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
If I give you a key to my place you have to promise to one day wake me up with a blowjob.
And by one day I mean once every two weeks.
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
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