the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
they call him Oral-B. enough said
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Randomize
