my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
Randomize
