Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
Convinced the bartender that I'm a congressman. Free Drinks. God bless America.
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
Randomize
