I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
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