she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
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