Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
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