i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
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