She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
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