you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
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