He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
Randomize
