wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
