Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
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