Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
Malibu has added tequila to its rum. It's like when two beautiful gaybies come together an spawn a unicorn that only cries jellybean tears.
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
last night I used snow as a chaser
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
Randomize
