you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
either way he was missing a nipple.
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
Driving you two to the party with a keg belted into the back seat has given me a brief glimpse of parenthood. I am now more resolved than ever to never breed, so thanks for that.
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
Randomize
