So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Randomize