Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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