Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
As soon as the clock wound down to zero, she declared "HALF-TIME HEAD" and pulled down my pants. After the swallow, she said "BEER CHASER," got me a new one, and asked if she could make me a sandwich. Pretty sure she's lobbying hard for a ring.
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
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