And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
Randomize
