I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
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