it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
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