she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
I used a jello pudding cup as a shot chaser last night. I'm the Bill Cosby of alcoholics
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
Randomize
