I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
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