I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize
